Roommate: Ripped out stuffing
by shi-chan
Summary: KabuIruKakaIru Valentines day is as red and loving as it can be. But not for Iruka. An accompnaying piece to Roommate.


Warning: OOC, slight sexual content, angst and perhaps tissue alert. Any misspellings or wrong grammar is unintentional. I am my own beta. I could have missed some stuff.

I do not own Naruto.

**ROOM-MATE - Ripped out stuffing**

When evening rolled around, Iruka labeled his day as pathetic. He spent the entire morning seeing red everywhere. Every store he passed by, there was something red or pink or something that resembled a bear with hearts. The dormitory staff even went out of their way to bring 'feeling' in to the season by putting up red streamers in the main entrance. The mess hall serving staff even thought it'd be 'a nice change' to have red napkins, red plates and even went trough the extra mile of actually getting red serving trays and have red heart helium balloons to float around in the ceiling. Young men came and went either carrying a bouquet of red roses (it was starting to get boring, but Iruka did spot someone carrying red carnations) or carrying some stuffed animal of some sorts with enough red to blind a person. Everything was just so red and _lovey_ that day.

Iruka also took note that even the hospital was feeling the season's love and romance. As he walked out of Ryuuken's office after his sessions, he found balloons and heart-cut-outs decorating the nurse's desk along with some of the wards (when he asked the nurses, they said it kept their patients happy). He didn't want to say he was envious; Valentines day was usually a headache for him because that meant his doorstep would be flooded with gifts from admirers and closet perverts (and from friends and well wishers - those are the ones he appreciated).

Iruka would never forget the amount of thongs he received the previous year; it nearly gave him heart attack at the sight of just how dirty and _indecent_ his admirer's choices were. But not matter how many gifts he received (all ranging from cute stuffed toys and balloons to expensive chocolate to indecent thongs and nipple clamps), he always ended up spending the day on his own. Hanging out with Izumo and Kotetsu was out of the question (especially after that incident in the mess hall where Izumo had argued with Kotetsu when he was given a bear with "You're the romance in my pants" quote on its tummy; Iruka had to hit them both on the head before the argument turned in to a food fight) since they'd be too busy with each other.

He didn't mind spending time alone; after all that's happened three months ago, being alone seemed more inviting than company.

The elevator doors slid open and Kabuto stepped in, a shoulder bag slung around his body, his coat sleeves tied securely to one side of the handles. "Ah! Iruka-san!"

Iruka couldn't stop the smile from reaching his eyes. He was glad to see Kabuto again. He's been busying himself lately and they keep missing each other during Iruka's almost frequent visits to the hospital. "Good to see you, Kabuto-san. How have you been?"

Kabuto gripped the handle of his bag, smiling. "Oh I'm okay. Very good to finally see you again. I'm surprised you didn't' cancel today. No plans?"

"No, no plans." Iruka smiled back, the elevator door sliding open again when they reached the ground floor. "An evening alone with some peace and quiet." He said, feeling a bit bitter. He glanced at Kabuto, noticing his white hair and looked away as a familiar face loomed in his head. This time, it wasn't Mizuki.

"Ah, I see." Kabuto said, walking towards the main exit. Their walk remained quiet; it wasn't up until they reached the main gates did Kabuto speak again. "Iruka-san, I was going to go grab dinner. Join me."

Iruka turned to look at Kabuto once more, noting his features again; he wondered how one person can have almost the same trait as another and yet seem _so_ different. It reminded him of how painfully alone he was that day, how envious he got of couples simply being together and how desperate he felt.

"Sure." Iruka answered and followed Kabuto to a small quiet sushi bar just outside of the dormitories.

"There's this sushi bar I frequent at." Kabuto said, leading the way with a smile.

Their meal was pleasant with Kabuto striking up quite a good conversation as they ate roll after roll and had a little too much sake to drink. Iruka knew that Kabuto could hold his alcohol well and he had confidence in his own ability to do so too. Kabuto was kind, accommodating and very attentive to his words. He was gentle and wasn't pushy, knew what to say and what not to say and most of all, he simply wanted to give out so much but Iruka found himself shaking his head and accepting none of it. He couldn't find himself to fall for Kabuto and while they had a bit of a history together, he simply couldn't find the drive in his heart to go after someone else.

He walked Kabuto back to the dorms, going as far as dropping him off in front of his own door. "Dinner was good. I think we drank a bit too much though."

Kabuto chuckled good naturedly as he inserted the key in to his door and turned the lock. "You looked too sad to be left alone."

His shoulders slowly stiffened at the sentence, hand reaching up to absentmindedly finger the small white and new scar on his temple, just by his hairline. "Ah, too much red and love everywhere." Iruka answered awkwardly. "I better get going. No doubt, I'll have a hang over by tomorrow. You look tired yourself. Get some rest."

Kabuto grasped his hand tugged at him to come closer. "So are you, Iruka-san."

Iruka was pulled closer and he found himself sighing and shaking his head. "Kabuto, you know I can't."

"You're stressed. You're tired. You're _alone_." Kabuto reasoned, kissing the corners of Iruka's lips and giving the warm folds of flesh a slow lick. "It doesn't have to be anything. It doesn't have to _mean_ anything."

Iruka could feel the effects of alcohol then as Kabuto wrapped his warm arms around his neck and kissed him slowly, gently coaxing him to part his lips open. Iruka suddenly felt too warm in his light sweater and too heady to focus. He pulled back, turning his head away. "Kabuto -"

"It's just sex. Nothing more, I promise." Kabuto said, kissing his chin and neck, leaving a mark on the tanned flesh. "I don't want anything but I don't want you to be alone tonight either. Stay. Relax. That's all."

Much to his reluctance, Iruka found himself inside Kabuto's neat room. The bed sheets were crisp and clean, his stack of medical text books all arranged by size and subject on his desk. The laptop screen was the only light illuminating room as Kabuto started peeling Iruka's clothes off, encouraging the tanned hands to touch his body and just feel as opposed to think and brood.

Iruka found himself being kissed deeply as his back hit the mattress, hair lose and splayed over the jasmine-scented pillow as Kabuto's screen-illuminated face smiled down at him and kissed his nose scar for reassurance. He could feel Kabuto's lips take care of his already hot and burning skin as he blindly stared at the ceiling, soft hands touching his sides and fingering the surgical steel jewelry on his navel, a tongue sensually licking at the other jewelry on his nipple. Iruka closed his eyes then, surrendering to the feel of being pleasured as Kabuto's hands stroked him slowly and gently, coaxing him in to an arousal that he couldn't feel at the start of it all.

As promised, it was just sex. Kabuto took care of him, riding him to completion. Iruka didn't know how many times orgasm came to him that night; everything suddenly turned animalistic and desperate, the hormonal part of his mind finally taking over his good conscience and simply grasping the chance to allow all the sexual frustration that remained so miraculously calm flow out.

By dawn, Iruka found himself staring at the slightly familiar wall, counting the odd shapes of the wallpaper as Kabuto remained curled up beside him, asleep. The room was a mess then, rolls of tissue discarded on the floor, bed sheets half undone and pillows rumpled from all the biting and gripping. Iruka felt sad even after all the pleasure. Sleep evaded him till dawn finally crept in. He remained as he was on his back, arm gently stroking the back of Kabuto's neck as the young med-student slept on without a care in the world. Iruka kept brooding. He knew he was desperate and he hated himself for using and dragging Kabuto in to his emotional mess, no matter how many times the young man insisted that it was just sex. Sex could never be just sex to Iruka anymore.

When the digital clock on Kabuto's dresser struck eight, Iruka slowly and quietly untangled himself from Kabuto's arms, standing up and gently covering up Kabuto's bare frame with the blanket again. He left the curtains drawn, moving around to clear the mess in the room. He folded Kabuto's clothes over his swivel chair and emptied the trash bin in his connected bathroom that was filled with crusty white-stained tissues. He left the room to fetch a snack for Kabuto as he got rid of the trash, leaving the door unlocked so he can let himself in later.

When he returned with a breakfast meal, he left the sandwich and juice packet on Kabuto's table before moving to sit on the corner of bed. Kabuto did not shift from his initial sleeping position since last night, breaths soft and even as Iruka pulled the hair back and away from Kabuto's face.

"I'm going to leave now." Iruka whispered, looking sorry for having to leave so soon after a night full of good sex.

Kabuto shifted then, turning to look at him through sleepy eyes. "Don't beat yourself up over this."

Iruka merely smiled sadly. "I'll try not to." He said, suddenly feeling very honest.

"He's a fool." Kabuto mumbled, eyes drooping close again. "Please don't feel bad. I don't. I enjoyed last night."

Iruka planted a friendly kiss on Kabuto's cheek, the meaning getting across when Kabuto looked up at him and grinned. "I left breakfast on the table. You have classes today, so make sure you're ready by then."

"Yes, brother." Kabuto chuckled and touched Iruka's face. "You know where to find me if you _ever_ need anything, ne?"

Iruka nodded and gave his hand an affectionate squeeze. "I know." He whispered and slowly got up and headed for the door. He turned the lock from the inside and stepped out in to the hallway as Kabuto shifted in bed and snuggled deeper in to the blanket.

"Happy Valentines day, Iruka-san." Kabuto mumbled sleepily.

Iruka could only smile as he closed the door softly and headed back to his room.

XXX

He was not surprised to find his neighbor placing presents in to a large box by his door step. There was a large box beside the second one Aoba was putting stuff in and still, a pile lay cluttered on his door mat. No matter how many wrapped packages Aoba tried putting neatly in to the large box, the pile didn't seem to be getting any smaller.

"Aoba, you didn't have to." Iruka said, moving to help the kind man.

"It's amusing how you get all these. What do you do with them?" Aoba asked, shaking his head with a small smile.

"I share the chocolates, I dry the flowers and the toys I usually donate or give away. I'm not much of teddy bear person. Some I'd keep but I usually get doubles."

"Pretty sweet of you." Aoba said.

"I'll handle these." Iruka said, unlocking his dorm room as Aoba pushed the two full boxes inside the room and dusted his hands.

"Oh well, happy unwrapping." He said, giving a small wave and disappeared in to his own room.

Iruka sighed and started picking up the rest of the packages and carried them to his bed. He shut door and headed directly for his bathroom to take a shower; he wanted to wash away any of the traces that remained on his body from the other night. Changed and freshly dressed minutes later, he started going through the tedious task of sorting the presents out as he unwrapped them. He'd keep the chocolates and maybe some of the nicer shirts he received as a present (he was going to get rid of all the horrible and unbearable underwear he received). The rest he had to give away.

He was clearing out the wrappers away when he noticed a small package, the size of his palm, lay forgotten on the floor.

"Oh brother, give me a break." He mumbled, stuffing the wrappers in to a large plastic bag before bending and picking up the small plainly wrapped present. It felt soft under the stiff black wrappings, not a trace of red or even a name on the package.

Sighing tiredly, Iruka unwrapped the package and found his heart slowly stop as he stared at the little familiar dolls in his palm. He knew what they were and knew immediately where they came from even without reading the note tied around the leg of a silver haired doll with the obnoxious parody of a messy and puffy standing hair. He stared at the doll of himself, fingering the stitched scar on the flat nose and the small smile made of light beige threads. His eyes trailed over to the lazy looking eye that was stitched just as well on the other doll, wearing a signature blue high collared jacket and a patterned folded bandana (the patterns were painted on) around the head and covering what was a red eye when Iruka lifted the said bandana.

It felt like he was holding Kakashi's soul in his palm.

He shakily sat himself on the floor as he eyed Kakashi's doll self in his hands, setting the doll of himself on his lap. He took notice of how the stuffing was protruding from Kakashi's doll chest around the area where the heart should be in. He tugged the note tied to the leg free and unfolded it, eyes scanning the neat and thin pen strokes.

_Been working on this even before everything happened. I finished yours but I can't finish mine. I can't sew Kashi's chest close; the stuffing won't stay in because it got ripped out. Maybe one day, you'll be able to stitch it close. It keeps coming out on its own no matter how I try to stuff it back in._

_Happy Valentines._

_Henohenomoheji_

Iruka closed his eyes and stood up, setting the dolls on his desk and tucking the note in to one of the boxes in his drawers. He didn't want to think about it and he won't. He pulled on a sweater and grabbed the nearest box of chocolates from the pile, taking his backpack and leaving the room. He had classes to attend to and he didn't want to be in the same room where 'Kashi' can stare at him and plead for him to stitch his chest closed. He felt angry and hurt, useless and suddenly very tired of everything.

But despite all that, he couldn't find it himself to cry anymore. Kakashi had already robbed all of his tears. He had nothing left but a gaping emptiness inside him and perhaps a bitter memory of what he believed he had.

Iruka was like his doll self that Kakashi made; just plain cotton stuffing within a pieced and carefully constructed stitched fabric.

He couldn't help but laugh bitterly at the irony of it all.

FIN

This was meant to be fluffy and sparkly. It turned in to angst. Kabuto's role here is significant. I needed him because he's the person Kakashi's despises the most in this story.

This is actually part of the plot. I think it's a spoiler but oh well ...

Happy Valentines everyone!


End file.
